I spent my 70th birthday filling in forms to rent an apartment in New York City. It is only about five blocks from the house our son, Jim, just bought in Jackson Heights, a section of Queens. We are quite excited about our new apartment in a prewar building. High ceilings and a large entrance hallway give it a lot of character.
That night, Jim, a fabulous cook, made a birthday dinner for me at his house. Our grandchildren are at camp, so it was Jacquie, Jim, and Rachel celebrating with me. It’s the first time we celebrated my birthday with family in many years. The meal and conversation reminded us why we are uprooting ourselves from our beloved Coleridge Road filled with such good friends and neighbors. Family is so important.
And then came the birthday candle. Ever since I discovered two years ago that I cannot eat wheat, I have not had a birthday cake. So, Jim stuck a candle on chili lime melon salad. Just one candle shaped like a zero. You know, the kind that you put on a cake with a numeral next to it so that you don’t set off the smoke detector. Jim, who works for Match.com, and Rachel, who is starting a new congregation, are incredibly busy. I figured, “They probably found this in a drawer, but did not have time to get a seven.”
But, I learned the zero was deliberate.
In Judaism, those who arrive at the biblical “three score and ten” get to begin again. In fact, if you are fortunate enough to make it to 83, you can have a second bar (or bat) mitzvah, just like any other 13-year-old.
That candle was a blessing. Ever since I retired two years ago, I’ve felt “finished”, not like a fine piece of furniture, but like a worn-out plow horse. I’ve tried to put a good face on it. “I’m going to be a writer!” I said. And that has given me a sense of purpose, but this new beginning is different. It is open-ended, like birth.
As Jacquie and I have been getting ready for this move, selling our house, getting rid of a ton of “stuff,” we keep recalling Abraham and Sarah, who left Haran, at about our age, to follow a call to create a new life. They were city dwellers heading to the country. We are farm kids who are heading toward the largest metropolitan area in the U.S.A. But we, like them, are walking in faith, because we do not really know where we are going.
All we know is that we are beginning. At seventy years of age, that is a blessing, indeed.
The best is still coming – Happy Birthday.
Oh my dear, dear Roger, how do you do it? I read your postings and am laughing & crying simultaneously. What a God-bestowed gift you have my friend. It was such a huge blessing spending time with you & Jacquie Sunday last at Kate’s. You both light up my heart is ways few others are capable of. Truly, IMHO, to know you is to love you & I’m not just saying that Roger. Both Mike & I are so pleased that God, in His infinite wisdom, chose to not only put you in our lives but in our hearts as FAMILY also. Please, please keep us informed of your new life in NYC. I cannot say we won’t worry about you & Jacquie but we rest assured that you will be in God’s hands wherever you are & OUR LOVE will be there also… … And Happy “0” dear friend !
It was great to see you and Michael, too. I think I enjoy the Feldbauer reunion almost as much as Jacquie and that is saying a LOT. Thanks for your good wishes.
I turned 70 this year also!and while all my friends moaned and groaned about turning the “dreaded “ 70, I felt grateful, blessed and every other good adjective to be able to enjoy family, volunteer at dog shelters and the hospital, tutor English and be active!I have weathered the storm and am glad to be here! Cheers! Roger!
I’ve been watching your posts. You are a good example of starting anew. Blessings on you, your family, your patients, your students, and the dogs!!
I like it! I like it! I like it! Yes, starting over again at 70, being re-born at 70. Yes, you two are making a wonderful new beginning. We look forward to being able to celebrate your bar mitzvah.
I so needed to read this … today.
I turned 71 this year and much like you Roger was feeling like a tired old mare … I have found new energy, helping others and continuing my nursing career a couple days a week at North Coast Health and most importantly enjoying each and every moment I have been given.
Happy Birthday, happy move … 💚🌻🎂
Well said my friend. I love the idea of starting over. A new chance. Since I pretty well blew off my confirmation class maybe I should take a confirmation class again if I live to what was it 83? Best of luck and God’s blessings in your new home in Queens.
You made me laugh!
Blessings on you both. I know what you both have been going thru as I to have been shrinking my possessions in preparation to moving to Otterbein which is closer to two of my children.
Your friends Wil and Ed are now in Town Center Community in Avon Lake
And doing well.
Congratulations on the exciting new beginning! I love the story of the zero and will plan to share at my mother’s upcoming birthday. Thank you and best wishes to the new adventures in NYC